Macrobiotics Today, November/December 1994, Vol. 34, No. 6
"HIV: Fact or Fable?" Eli Hans
For just a moment, allow yourself the luxury of entering a state of suspended disbelief. We do it often at the movie theater when what is occurring on the screen couldn't possibly be true, yet, we believe it in order to go along with the plot.
So, come along with me on this story. Imagine that every newspaper in the world and every television newscast is exploding with the biggest news of the century: There is no conclusive scientific evidence, after all, that HIV, the virus accused of causing AIDS, has anything to do with immune suppression whatsoever. HIV has been unfairly blamed for a crime it didn't commit, held without bail, imprisoned without a trial. Innocent.
Day after day, year after agonizing year, HIV has been talked about, sworn at, hated, and feared as an ingenious killer with an uncanny ability to transmute into a thousand disguises, secretly moving in on the kill. Predator.
After years of research, thousands of lives lost, millions of people infected and counting every tick of the time bomb, and billions of dollars spent, the nightmare is finally over. Or maybe it has just begun. If HIV is not, and couldn't possibly be what causes immune suppression, what happens now? Do we rejoice and celebrate the happiest day the world has ever known? Or do we panic because that means a killer is still on the loose, and we still have no idea who or where it is?
What about those millions of people who have discarded most of their dreams of a future? Do they instantly get them back? And the hundreds of agencies around the world whose very existence rests upon a foundation of HIV belief? And to the pharmaceutical companies that have made the AIDS machine one of the biggest and most prosperous industries of this century? And to the doctors who have been grasping for solutions, many of which know the meaning of "suspended disbelief" quite well because what they are told and what they have actually witnessed and experienced are often not the same thing?
But no one would feel the impact more profoundly than the gentle souls hanging from a thread, or from a web of IV cables, lingering, poised in a haze of confusion, wondering what in the world has made them so sick, if it isn't HIV.
How can they explain the ghastly, unrecognizable reflection of their face upon the mirror? And the pharmacy of pill bottles on their night stand? And the hospital bills and the careers lost?
All right. Forget it. The movie is over. Too unbelievable for a box office hit. Not marketable. And who could we find to star in a film like this, anyway?
The Real World
Actually, in the real world, unbeknownst to most people, the above scenario has been unfolding for the past several years. There are quite a number of individuals around the world, from all walks of life, who are not satisfied with the answers about AIDS and continue to question and seek truth. As of today, hundreds, if not thousands of people believe that there are serious discrepancies with the accepted theory that HIV = AIDS. There is an organization with over 500 members called Group for the Scientific Reappraisal of the HIV-AIDS Theory. These members aren't common folk, either. Some of the world's most prominent scientists belong to this group, seeking a reexamination of the cause of AIDS.
Some of the most noted members include Dr. Peter Duesberg, a professor of molecular biology at the University of California, Berkeley, and one of the world's leading experts on retroviruses. He contends that HIV is absolutely harmless, and that it cannot possibly cause immune suppression. He is the most vocal of all dissidents and has, unfortunately, suffered the consequences. His research will not be published by any major medical journal, and his funding has been removed. He is considered a pariah. Kary Mullis, winner of the 1993 Nobel Prize in chemistry has recently joined forces in the vocal/public arena. Dr. Charles Thomas, a Harvard biochemist and molecular physicist publishes the newsletter "Rethinking AIDS." Robert Root-Bernstein, associate professor of Physiology at Michigan State University, is the author of a book titled Rethinking AIDS, which shatters our assumptions and reopens fundamental questions concerning what we really know about AIDS. Other supporters include John Lauritsen, author of The AIDS War; Harvey Bialy, editor of Bio/Technology; Dr. Joseph Sonnabend, Founder of AMFAR (American Foundation for AIDS Research); Celia Farber, journalist, who has followed this story from the beginning; Jerry Terranova, Founder of CURENOW; Eli Hans, currently authoring a book entitled Transformational Healing - The Gift of HIV, who has been HIV positive since 1986 and has intuitively known that something was amiss with the entire HIV screenplay.
I bring this to your attention simply to present the truth about what is surrounding this enormous issue. The fact that we have all been fed information about HIV, and that it is commonly accepted as the cause of AIDS, doesn't mean that it is so. There have been hundreds of documented cases of people who have died of clinically diagnosed AIDS who never tested HIV positive. By the way, it is important to note that testing positive for HIV only indicates the presence of antibodies. It does not necessarily mean that the virus is either present, nor active. It means that at some point, the individual came into contact with what is being termed HIV, and the body's immune response created antibodies - our body's natural line of defense. Antibodies remain present for a lifetime in case the organism enters the system again. This has always been the premise behind immunity and vaccinations. Most of us are polio positive, because we have been immunized. That does not mean we have symptoms of polio. Why is a recognized sign of immunity, the antibodies, suddenly a death sentence in the case of HIV? How can the medical community ignore what has been accepted for the last century? And most of all, why are we spending money researching a vaccine for the HIV negative population? It will, in essence, convert everyone into HIV positives. This topic is so complex and convoluted, I often wonder if we will ever get to the bottom of it. It is overwhelming to realize that so much of what is happening behind the scenes is not even regarded as a possibility by the majority of the population. The "front" of AIDS isn't what it appears to be.
In our society there is a need to pin things down in order to anchor ourselves in a turbulent sea of unanswered questions. We don't like to drift. No one is to blame for what has occurred with the HIV roller coaster. At the beginning, there was enormous pressure on the scientific community to come up with an answer. So, they did. They gave us a much needed anchor. However, there is much disharmony in the scientific community about the findings, the announcement to the world, and subsequent assimilation of the HIV hypothesis. After all, the entire issue has been politicized to a point where we have lost all sense of focus.
Some people who have examined the research and the sequence of events from the start, consider the entire HIV theory to be fraudulent. Others, those who accept the HIV hypothesis, consider those people to be heretics. Trouble makers. Media hungry lunatics.
What Is the Cause?
You may be asking: If it isn't HIV what could it be? There are as many theories as there are questions. I believe that there isn't one cause. For all we know, it may not be a single germ at all. Western medicine is in the habit of pegging diseases to one germ. It makes things nice and tidy. And, who knows, there may be instances when it proves to be correct. Yet, things aren't always so clear-cut. There are many factors that contribute to immune suppression all over the world. Many of them are obvious such as: malnutrition caused by depleted food supply and lack of education, chemical and environmental toxicity, stress of modern living, abuse of drugs and substances (medical and recreational), infections treated with powerful pharmaceuticals, etc. Others aren't as obvious: oppression of people by other people, fear, self-abuse, lack of love, victim mentality, degradation. I am suggesting that, on top of everything else, the AIDS crisis is a crisis in consciousness. It didn't just happen. And, it isn't an accident. It has a purpose, which will unfold and show itself as soon as we are ready to learn the lesson.
If all those factors cause immunosuppression, you may ask, why are there certain groups of people who exhibit AIDS symptoms when the above description can apply to a broad population?
Good question. And, again, there are many theories. My answer is that when a certain group of people engage in similar actions and behaviors, similar "symptoms" or results will appear in that population. There are always exceptions to everything, yet, overall, the populations who have been most affected by the AIDS crisis have been minorities. Gays, Afro-Americans, Asians, Hispanics, and now, according to newspaper headlines, women. Minorities in societies tend to be excluded, oppressed, and not given equal status. So, because we are all human and this hurts deeply, there also tends to be alcohol and drug abuse, malnutrition, low self-esteem, poor hygiene, and a myriad of other factors that affect immunity. I find it quite interesting that the group least affected by AIDS is the white, heterosexual male. This observation in not intended to be male-bashing. It is simply a statistic.
Everyone knows that the gay population has been hard hit by the AIDS crisis. Why this particular group? This is a group of people who are, by and large, not tolerated, despised and attacked in our society. There is a high incidence of self-hatred, low self-esteem, fear, guilt, shame, lack of love. As a result, addictions to drugs, alcohol, antidepressants, sugar, stimulants and sex are rampant. Some years ago, it was common for gay men to "catch" sexually transmitted diseases often, and get treated with large doses of antibiotics. All of the above are severely immunosuppressive.
Life Essence
Another very interesting element which may come into play is the Taoist view of sex and, specifically, the male orgasm. Semen is considered to be the "essence" of life, a sort of battery which stores vitality and a source of resistance and immunity. When a man ejaculates, the Chinese say he has "lost his essence," "thrown it away." Excessive ejaculation gradually weakens a man's primary source of vitality, leaving him vulnerable to disease and possibly shortening his life span. Taoist advice on this subject is for men to learn to regulate ejaculations to an absolute minimum, thus retaining semen-essence, and increasing the quantity of life-giving hormones in order to grow strong and healthy. To the Western man, this concept is absurd, if not impossible. Taoist lovemaking does not recommend abstinence. On the contrary, the emphasis lies on technique for the enjoyment of sex, learning to increase "essence" and retain it in the body for its healing effects, rather than "throw it away" leaving a man exhausted and depleted.
In the gay community, in celebration of sexual liberation, there has been a tendency toward multiple partners in the past. For some people, this meant hundreds, if not thousands, of encounters per year, with much "essence" being lost. The fact that the incidence of AIDS has decreased in this population may have something to do with the emphasis on returning to monogamy and curtailing promiscuity.
A macrobiotic principle states that everything that has a front has a back. Thus, the bigger the front, the bigger the back. The tragedy of AIDS and HIV has an enormous, ugly front. Everyone knows that and I can say it from experience, because I have lived it. The first few years of simply knowing I was HIV positive were a living nightmare. Yet, I can also say that I have discovered the "back" of the HIV experience. It is filled with wonder and miracles and pure love. And the gift of it is spiritual transformation.
The Foundation
The journey hasn't been easy, and there are times when I lose my footing and confront that villain called "Fear." Yet overall, the past few years have been a blessing in disguise. I began my expedition of self-healing by studying macrobiotic principles of balance and practicing a macrobiotic lifestyle. To me, learning macrobiotics for self-healing is not unlike learning the piano to be a musician. It is the foundation upon which everything else is built. Since the early days, I have looked into many other holistic alternatives and have followed my intuition on a daily basis to dictate what the next step is to be: yoga, T'ai Chi, Chinese herbs, vitamin and mineral supplements, or Ayurveda principles (which in many ways overlap with macrobiotics). They all interplay and harmonize. Yet, when in doubt, I always return to the basics. Macrobiotics.
The Biggest Lesson
Perhaps the biggest lesson to have learned, and the most difficult, is that I am fully responsible for the state of my life. And, my health is a reflection of that. Every thought I have, every action I take is integral to the state of my well-being. Healing doesn't mean "curing" the symptom. It means being in harmony with myself.
It also means loving myself fully, no matter what other people may think of me. It means being at peace with my decisions, honoring every aspect of my being, even the things I may not like at the moment. It means being honest and sharing my true feelings, especially with the people I love. It means opening up my heart and knowing that I am worthy to receive all the gifts life has to offer. It means having my intuition be my best friend, listening to the messages of my body and allowing the next step to show itself. It means going with the flow of life, allowing the Highest part of me to emerge. It means knowing that there is a connection between every living thing, and that every thing is living. We are all one. The atoms that make a tree, a rock, a bird, also make me, my neighbor and even a criminal.
Healing doesn't necessarily mean healing into life. It is very clear to me that some people choose to heal into death. It isn't always a conscious choice, yet many seem to find in death a sense of peace, completion with relationships, self-love and acceptance of a supreme aspect of themselves. And, they die. Death isn't a terrible thing.
Individuals dealing with HIV who are consciously choosing to begin a journey of self-discovery, have plenty of opportunities and avenues to pursue. There is a myriad of holistic alternatives which, I believe, can facilitate healing at a deep level. Self-healing is tremendously empowering. There is such an inbred expectation that somehow doctors and pills will heal us, most us have lost touch with the process of trusting our bodies to heal themselves. I am not opposed to medical intervention. It can save lives in miraculous ways. However, I do feel that we abuse that system, taking ourselves for granted in the process. I see medical intervention as a place to turn to when all else has failed. In our society, it usually works in the opposite manner. We approach holistic alternatives when medicine has failed us. Thus, we give our power away at a time when we need it most. We all have self-healing capabilities and inner wisdom to guide us through each and every step of recovery.
No Fear
My humble recommendation for people who are HIV positive and frightened to death is: Do not allow HIV fear to consume you. Disease often feeds on fear. HIV is simply a way to slap you into awakening. It isn't the cause of your troubles. Be grateful that you have been given an opportunity to heal your life and take the bull by the horns.
Take an objective look at your life, your past, and your present. Realize that you are responsible for everything in it. The good and the bad. This doesn't mean you must assume blame or guilt and beat yourself up. It means that since you are responsible for the state of your life, you have the power to change it!
Pretend, just for fun, that HIV is harmless. What might be other factors in your life which have affected your immune system? What actions can you take to ensure a healthy, happy life? What modifications do you need to make in your lifestyle? Who do you need to forgive? (Clue: look in the mirror.) There are hundreds of things you can do, you just need to begin somewhere. For me, learning about macrobiotics was the perfect start.
This does not mean you can pretend HIV doesn't exist and continue to live with behavior that may be harming you or others. Until the jury is out, we need to adhere to the current belief and parameters of HIV, safe-sex guidelines, etc. In the meantime, there is plenty you can do to take matters into your own hands. No prescription for wellness exists to suit everyone. Your path is as individual and unique as you are. There is plenty of support in this country to discover your particular path.
It is essential that we reconnect with our dreams and inner passion. It is also crucial to disengage from a mechanism where we believe everything we are told without question. The answers are found within each of us. Establishing a close and loving relationship with our intuition is a key factor in self-healing. As we learn to communicate with the Highest part of ourselves, we begin to clear the way, allowing light to shine where there once was none. We just need to open our eyes and see.
End of Article
Author bio-statement: Eli Hans lives in Santa Fe, NM where he facilitates wholistic self-healing programs for people who are HIV positive. For information call InnerQuest at (505) 466-1999.
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